Friday, February 25, 2011

Stopped crying but sick again

He's been attending school this whole week. There were only a few tears on Monday morning as I was changing him into his unifrom, but it stopped very soon.

Last weekend, I spent a lot of time with him on various activities. I felt that it might give him some assurance that I still do love him, and hope that it might boost his confidence a little (academically).

Another teacher there had suggested that it might have been because he was away from school (for the CNY break) and not used to it. This might be true as he had been absent from school a lot due to his illnesses.

I did tell him many many times that he was to go to school as he is a big boy now. In a few months he'd have to attend "big boy school" (primary school). He said that he wanted to attend big boy school now & not his kindergarten!

So this week, I had the time to sort through old worksheets, activity sheets, filing, reorganising some of his shelves, grocery shopping at the wet market. I also made several of my own maths worksheets, had the alarm technician come by (many times since last week!). I've not really had any rest even though I've not recovered fully.

A few days after his last round of illness, he started coughing AGAIN! It's gradually gotten worse over the week. Last night, the cough medicine knocked him out from 8pm - 2am. I guess that it wore off after that as he started coughing and had interrupted sleep.

So I gave him another dose of the drowsy medicince at 3am but he still coughed a lot until 5.30am, at which time, he annouced that he "had enough sleep". We did some reading, puzzles, until it was time for breakfast. Even though I gave him warm water and Olbas Oil, and another type of medicine (at 7am), he still had chesty cough. Then his runny nose started. Sigh.

I'm so tired. I'm so disappointed he's sick again. I was in half a mind to have him stay home today but decided against it cos I didnt want to go through all that crying and "I dont want to go to school anymore". It's Friday anyway (shorter school hours) and I'll strictly quarantine him this weekend.

Its very tricky getting the right room temperature for him at nights. I've tried with air cond at 28C with light blanket, at 26C with light blanket, and with thicker blanket, switching on and off air cond at half hour intervals, no air cond with and without blanket....etc. He still sweats in the first one or two hours of falling asleep and I quickly change his pyjama shirt. Later in the night, he sometimes sweats again or he kicks off the blanket. I'm at wits end.

I've recently started giving him Scotts Emulsion, resumed his probiotics, increased his Vit C dosage, and a tumeric drink (high antioxidant and to stop phlegm). Perhaps his immune system is just at a rather low point, so it takes a longer time to see results.

I'm guessing that his immune system had taken quite a beating and had not fully recovered before being attacked by yet another virus. He's been sick once in Nov, once in Dec, twice in Jan and now three times in Feb.

Before this most recent cold, we had decided to give him the flu shot. But he didnt recover long enough (just 2 days cough free) for us to bring him for it.

I'm very reluctant to quarantine him for extended periods (like a mth or 2) in order for his immune system to recover. That would bring him back to square one with the separation anxiety. Also, that would bring us too close to the international school assessment date.

Please pray for speedy recovery, for stronger immune system, for good night's sleep for both my son and myself.

Thursday, February 17, 2011

He cried in school

Now that he's recovered, he's been attending school. However, for the first time, he cried yesterday.

He vomitted slightly yesterday at the school's car park. But I thought that it might be just some phlegm he was trying to clear or that he had too much wind in his tummy. He did wake up very late (8am)yesterday cos he slept late (9.30pm) the night before, so I hurriedly gave him his milk in 15mins. Perhaps he didnt have the chance to clear his phlegm after waking up. Perhaps he drank his milk too quickly. But I didnt think he was sick.

I briefly spoke to the teacher as I drove past her to pick him up yesterday, asking how he was (cos he vomitted), and she told me that he cried! She said it was during English, and that perhaps he felt he didnt know the words, but the teacher thought that he actually does. I didnt have time to get into details then as I was in the car, so I left it to be discussed today.

As I drove right up to the gate and saw him, he was crying again! Such a pitiful cry, with his mouth in an upside down U shape. Not howling. He continued crying in the car but stopped as I reached the house.

At home, when I asked him what happened, he started crying again. I comforted him and reassured him that I love him very much forever and ever.

Later, I asked him what happened. He took a while to reply, then said "I miss you". He couldnt elaborate.

Much later, I asked more specific closed questions like whether the teacher scolded him, or a friend did something to him. He said no. I asked what he was doing at the time he cried, but he didnt reply. It was very difficult getting info from him, so I left it. My husband also tried many times to find out from him, but couldn't.

Today, he woke a little late (7.45am) even though he went to bed at 8.45pm. I reckon it was because he didnt sleep between 3-4am. That's partly my fault due to my coughing.

He vomitted some of his milk at home. I think he was trying to clear some phlegm. Then he refused to go to school saying that he's not well. He said that he has phlegm. That was not a good enough reason to stay home, so we wore his uniform for him despite him protesting. My husband would have a fit if my son didnt attend school again.

I had to carry him from the car to his classroom. He clung on to me so tightly. He didnt want to get down despite seeing his friends play. I spoke to the teacher while I was still carrying him. Then he started crying.

He stopped after some comforting, and managed to put him down with the group of boys playing cards. The principal happened to walk in, and asked me what happened yesterday at the waiting room. While I was talking to her, he started crying again, and needed to be carried and pacified.

Eventually, teacher got the lesson started, and with some difficulty, managed to put him on the floor with the others. I walked out saying that I had to help him put his bag outside. Then the BM teacher talked to me, giving me the work that he missed out on during his absence.

I stayed briefly to see him but he saw me and started crying again. I had to walk away...with a heavy heart. I could hear him wailing loudly. My heart got heavier. If I stayed to pacify him or to take him home, he might never want to go to school on his own again. If I didn't do that, he might refuse going to school totally. Sigh.

As I drove my car out of the parking lot past the main gate, a teacher came to say that he vomitted all over his shirt. I told her that he has a spare change of clothes in his bag, and drove off. Sigh. It was hard to do that.

I had to return his library books today, so it was good that I wasn't stuck at home overly worrying about him. I still worried about him but committed him to the Lord to take care of him. It's now 11am, and the school has not called me, so I presume he's "under control".

I've still got to help him gain confidence in himself. I'm not sure how to help him report back to me things that happen or are bothering him. How do I help him cope in school?

He's recovered

Thank you all who prayed for his recovery. He's much better now. He no longer coughs at night and I've stopped giving him his medicines.

He's still not gotten back his full energy though and is tired easily. He's also not sleeping through the night, waking around 2 or 3am and saying he can't fall asleep again. I have refused to carry him to help him fall asleep, as I wish to break that habit. So sometimes we talk a bit, or rather I mumble some slurry words every few minutes. Other times, he rolls around, tosses and turns.

I'm the one on a slow recovery now. My sore throat is gone and so is my blocked nose. But there seems to be a a slight runny nose way at the back of my nasal passage. At nights especially, it trickles to the back of my throat, causing me to cough badly. After a few days of this, my diaphragm and core muscles really hurt. This too has interrupted his sleep unfortunately.

Now, my sister has also caught the bug and has had a sore throat the past few days. Hope she recovers fast, with rest, water and Vit C.

Please do pray for speedy and complete recovery for myself and my sister.

Friday, February 11, 2011

He's not getting better

He hasn't resumed normal activities. He didn't go back to school on Thursday or today, Friday.

Please pray for a speedy complete recovery for my son (and myself)...and for understanding that I too want him back to school asap....but not at the risk of picking up other viruses...or at the risk of him getting worse.



Thursday

Around 2am on Thursday morning, he woke and coughed. He had difficulty going back to sleep because he kept on coughing. I packed his bag and took him to the hospital for a dose of the nebuliser. We came back about 4am and after a drink of water, put him to bed.

He slept past 9am. He was obviously tired. After his milk, I brought him for his next dose of nebuliser at 10+am. I went to the nearby hawkers to pack some lunch home, and by the time we got back it was 12noon.

Then it was time to feed him again, shower him, give him his syrup medicines, get him to drink some water, and shower myself...there was a lot of fussing, stalling, and protesting along the way.

Finally got him down for a nap at 4.15pm...and he slept right through to 7.15pm. He was tired out. I napped shortly with him too as I needed it.

Then it was time again to feed him, shower him, give him his medicines, drink his water, his milk, change him into his pyjamas, and shower myself....all accompanied by the usual fussing etc. I brought him for his nebuliser at 10pm and got home about 11.30pm.

By bed time, I was pretty much looking forward to sending him back to school today. At that point, he wasn't getting worse or better. I understood the concern and desire to send him back to school asap. I would have welcomed the break myself, so that I can get on with my To Do list. It's much easier to clear my errands than it is to look after a sick child, so please believe me that I want him back to school asap too.

Friday

He didnt sleep well. He had his chesty cough several times in the night even though I switched off the air cond, and even though he didnt sweat.

Around 7.15am, he woke and had on and off chesty cough for a few minutes. Since it was still early, I thought I could squeeze in a nebuliser before school. I got his bag ready and headed to do a round of nebuliser. There were so many people at the hospital but were lucky to be called head of the rest.

Strangely, he was still coughing a lot after his nebuliser. Usually, he wouldn't be coughing for hours. It got me worried. He was already cranky, even before completing the nebuliser, wanting to go home.

His hands were freezing. I reckon he was very hungry. I didnt bring his milk along cos I thought I'd feed him at home and send him off to school. I wasn't going to make him wait several hours, on an empty stomach, to see his dr.

We got home at 8.30am, fed him his milk and some cereal, gave him his medicine, and had my breakfast. By 9.45am, I was unsure whether to send him to school late, or not. I monitored him for the next 30mins. His nose was excreting mucus - coloured and thick - every few minutes even though I clean it up with cotton buds each time. That was unusual.

When I picked him up from school on Wednesday, the lower half of his face was smeared with dried mucus (he's not efficient in wiping his nose). He only finished half his water (or spilled it). So with that in mind, I decided to keep him home from school today.

After this post, I'll bring him for another round of nebuliser and again tonight. I hope he'll take a long nap today too. He needs the rest. He needs lots of water. He needs Vit C. He needs a more patient mom! LOL

Tomorrow morning, I plan to wait it out at the dr's clinic because I think he's developed a secondary bacterial infection (coloured mucus) and requires antibiotics. Unfortunately, there's likely to be lots of people and noise in the hospital lobby as there's a lion dance scheduled tomorrow morning.

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Sick again

We’re back in KL and I can’t believe he’s sick again. He had just recovered from the stomach flu in time for the CNY flight. A few days later, he started showing cold symptoms – started off with a runny nose. I had brought his cough, fever, and diarrhoea medicines with us, so after a day or so of having a continuous runny nose, I started him on Clarinase and Promethazine.

He was active during the day, playing a lot with his cousins. But he found it hard to sleep through the night. It was tricky finding the right combination of factors affecting his body temperature - the air conditioning, the blanket, the right number of layers of clothing, his internal body temperature (was he “heaty” from the travel or “cold” from the unusually strong winds this year?). This resulted in him waking up in sweat a few nights in a row, and crying.

A few days before our flight back, he started having chesty coughs at night. It was especially bad upon waking. I was ready to bring him to the local hospital there for nebulizer (although I didn’t bring his Duovent and Pulmicort) but decided to monitor him instead. Luckily his symptoms didn’t deteriorate too much before our flight home.

We arrived home late Saturday evening and I brought him to the hospital for his nebulizer after dinner. He had another dose of nebuliser on Sunday night. He didn’t seem too bad on Monday so I skipped his nebuliser but he was having difficulty breathing (stuffed up nose) on Monday night. The entire Tuesday morning (4 hours!) was spent at the hospital waiting to see his paediatrician, waiting for his turn at the nebuliser, and waiting for his medicine (Prednisolone to open up his airways) to be dispensed.

He was absent (again!) from school Mon and Tues this week but we decided to send him today even though he hasn’t fully recovered. He was active during the day on Monday, and his cough seems to be more frequent at night. In the past, and again today when I spoke to her, the teacher encouraged me to send him to school unless he’s really, really sick. Also, they had a lion dance performance and class party today, which he was keen to attend.

My husband also caught a virus before we were due to fly back. He had a temperature, very sore throat and generally tired. I managed to hold off the virus until Sunday night cos I could rest when away for CNY. I think the worst of the symptoms is over for all of us, and are on the road to recovery.

My son will take some time for him to shake off the symptoms. Since he is a bit stronger than a few years ago, we will resume normal activity for him. However, it has now gone down to his lungs, and because his lungs are sensitive, I must still monitor my son closely.

Friday, February 4, 2011

Hoppity New Year

Here’s wishing all readers and their families celebrating Chinese New Year, Gong Xi Fa Chai. May you be blessed with good health, peace, and happiness.

My son recovered sufficiently from his stomach flu to catch the flight! Thanks to all who prayed for him and the advice given.

Since this is the year of the rabbit, I’ll also write about our adopted pet, a 1 year+ old rabbit, which joined our family around Sept 2010.

I stress that we adopted the pet and it was not bought. Our neighbour down the road had 2 rabbits. As the newer and younger rabbit grew larger, it became aggressive towards the older rabbit. It kept attacking the older rabbit and it got so bad that it bit off part of the other’s nostril. So, they had to give one away.

Seeing that my son has a gentle demeanour, they felt a rabbit would make a suitable pet as rabbits are very timid.

The rabbit was very warmly welcomed and immediately loved by all at home, including my helper. My son talked to him, wishing him good night, asking him how he is etc. My son also on occasion brushes his fur and strokes him.

I do agree with what’s written in the papers that rabbits are not low maintenance pets. I reckon they are lower maintenance compared to say dogs, but not exactly low maintenance.

There is lots of poo to clean up (my helper collects it for use as fertiliser), and its urine has a strong odour. Its nails require clipping which actually scares the poor creature. It gets to roam in the patio during the day and provided it’s not raining, it gets a free run in the garden in the evenings. It consumes quite a fair bit of rabbit food (contrary to popular believe, carrots are not a staple) so I bulk buy on trips to the pet shop. It also requires regular brushing to minimise hair balls in its digestive tract.

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

First month in new class

I meant to share this piece of good news with you a few weeks ago but he was down with the cold and more recently, down with a stomach flu.

Since the new academic year started on 3rd Jan, he’s attended kindergarten without me and without a shadow aide! A big milestone for him!

For the few weeks before school started, I was rather anxious as I didn’t know whether they required him to be with a shadow aide. I didn’t wish to bring it up to them prior to school starting cos I feared that they would take the opportunity to require him to have a shadow aide.

The first day

The first few minutes of meeting the teacher for the first time on the first day was a bit awkward as I didn’t know if I’m supposed to be with him. I was happy that she preferred that I wasn’t there (she explained it’s because she wanted him to be more independent) but I was really worried too.

School was dismissed early at 11.15am on the first three days to ease the kids back into the academic year. They had prepared a coffee corner for the parents who wished to wait there for the kids.

I was extremely anxious so I chose to wait there. Luckily there was another mother (an ex-colleague) who was also waiting there, so I chatted with her (it seemed like a long chat cos I was so anxious). I only took a peek to see how he was doing during snack time (I was worried he might gag/vomit/can’t open his drink). The rest of the time, I distracted myself by reading the papers.

Subsequent days

On the second and third days, I chose to head home as I didn’t feel comfortable amongst the other parents and their topics of conversation – it’s just a different world that I live in.

I try to arrive a few minutes early just to speak to the teacher each day but sometimes we arrive just before the bell rings so I don’t always get that chance. Now that I’m not with him, I don’t know how he’s coping, what his specific needs are, what areas he’s progressing well in, how his friends perceive him etc.

Reporting back

We were worried that he was not able to report back to us things that happen in school, especially things that bother him. In the first week, I couldn’t get any information out of him despite asking open questions and specific questions. I only got a few one word answers. When I asked him how was school, his usual reply was “It was good”. When asked if he liked his teacher, he’d reply “Yes”. When asked if she was fierce, he replied “No”. When asked if she shouted or scolded him, he said “No”.

One day he returned home with a party pack. He wasn’t able to tell me the name of his friend who celebrated his birthday. He could though, tell me (via specific closed questions) it was a boy and he was a new friend (ie. not from his previous class). It’s important that he learns the names of his classmates in case anyone of them does something to him which he doesn’t like.

When he returned back to school after his 2 week absence due to a cold, there was more information (bits of it anyway) forthcoming from him.

Once while walking to the car after picking him out from school, he told me he “did reading”.

One night while getting ready for bed, he told me that Wednesday is pronounced as “whens-day” rather than “WED-nes-day” according to his teacher.

Another time, also before bedtime, he asked if there were bones in his body. I told him there were but octopuses and squids didn’t. I thought he was recalling something he watched on TV. He then told me there were lots of bones in the hand. He then told me the head bone is called the skull. I remembered that I taught him that many months ago. Back then I had talked to him about the skeletal body, showed him a well illustrated book belonging to his CST therapist on the body and the full sized skeleton she had in her house.

However when I next had the chance to talk to the teacher (when he returned back to school after his absence due to the stomach flu), the teacher confirmed that she had taught them about the bones in their body!

After that incident, I was hopeful that in future, he might tell me more about what happens in class. I am still worried whether he would tell me if something’s bothering him. So far, he’s just telling me what teacher taught, not what his friends did or said, and not what he finds difficult. For example, if it weren’t for the teacher checking with me over the shoe incident (see below) I wouldn’t have known about it.

His Teacher

Teacher said that he’s fine, he’s ok. I think she’s referring to him not having behavioural problems, that he can follow instructions, that he knows his numbers etc.

Teacher is pushing him a little in certain areas, to get him to improve. She tried to get him to colour on the first few days (he’ll only colour if I help him!), to get him to move faster (e.g. close his tumbler faster), to get him to put down his left arm, to talk louder etc.

On Monday (24th Jan), she asked if it’s alright with me if he takes part on Sports Day because she wanted him to and she noticed that he can run. I was happy to hear that she wanted him included (and that implicitly she didn’t feel that sports is all about winning only). She said not to worry about that “the powers that be” might not want him participating.

On Wednesday morning (26th Jan), she asked if he complained about the teacher the previous day. He didn’t. She explained that he couldn’t put on his shoes after completing the e-teaching lesson (For 2011, e-teaching is done in a new room and no shoes allowed in). He apparently called out to his friends for help (I’m amazed!) but teacher told his friends not to help him, as she wanted him to learn to do it himself. She said that he cried (he said he “cried” without tears i.e. protest) and struggled. Teacher helped him a little and noted that his fingers got in the way of inserting the strap through the D ring on his shoe and his fingers weren’t strong enough to pull the Velcro straps tightly. He can take his shoes off easily by himself but I explained that he’s still in the process of learning to put on his shoes. It’s a slow tiny step by step process that requires loads of practice for each tiny step.

At home, I’ve showed him short cuts to putting on his shoe and he doesn’t seem to have a huge struggle with it (just a slight struggle) but things are different in school, I guess. So I’m now thinking of buying a normal pair of white canvas school shoes for him, just to make things a little less stressful for him in school. It’ll mean having to learn how to put on not just his custom-made black shoes, but also his new pair of school shoes. I’ll buy them after CNY.

Settling in

I’d say that after the first month, he’s still in the process of settling in but is making good progress, especially in light of the 2 weeks of absenteeism due to his cold and stomach flu.

In the first week of starting school there were a few nights where he woke up in the middle of the night crying and it was a bit difficult to soothe him back to sleep. I suspect it might be him adjusting to attending kindergarten on his own.

Better things to come

However, he seems happy going to class each morning. He’d run along the corridor towards his class. He’d happily choose a place on the floor to sit amongst his friends. He usually gives me a big smile before I walk away.

I believe there’ll be further progress in his social skills, his confidence, his self care skills, self regulation, and in terms of his academic abilities, with the right support from his class teacher and acceptance from his classmates.